January 1st 2011 and I’m sat at the table with Sinem and Tommy eating some amazingly tasty and incredibly garlic filled dip made from aubergines, that Sin promises will make me stink for at least a week.
Happy New Year :o)
I woke up, eventually, today… after a drink fuelled festive fun day yesterday. Miraculously I had managed to stay awake til midnight to jump around the living room before letting the intoxication overcome me about half an hour or so later.. not sure when I finally passed out.
Anyway today I woke and thought ‘eugh’.
I’m toxic. Thanks to thoughts and foods and alcohol.
I then thought.. you know what? 2011 has to be different. I want to be different. And I definitely don’t want to feel shite like this again – I’m 40 not 14, after all.
So I put on my bikini and got my flip cam out, standing in the kitchen with the door firmly shut to make a video. I felt a bit sorry for my neighbour really, as he was cooking at the time and I didn’t notice until after, lol.
Sitting down to watch and edit the recording, all I can think is OMFG (oh my f***ing gawd), I can’t use it!
Here’s my statistics and disgusting photo’s of me in my bikini:
Weight: 11 stone 12.5 lbs / 166.5 pounds /75.5 kg
Body Fat: 39%
Chest: 109 cm / 43″
Waist: 94 cm / 37″
Belly: 109 cm / 43″
Arm: 32 cm / 12.5″
Thigh: 62 cm / 24.5″
You know, you spend that much time half naked in front of a camera, you ought to be submitting to HNT!
Come to think of it, that’s actually not such a bad idea. Exposing bits of myself every Thursday helped me to learn some self-love. You don’t have to take pictures of naughty bits you know.
I really think you should try it x
lol I suppose I do! And yes, I think maybe I will.. I didn’t realise you actually submitted it somewhere, can you give me some details? Thankyou x
A Very Happy New Year to you Sarah,
I think this year should be about you not thinking about what you shouldn’t eat and therefore craving it more and caving in and beating yourself up, but to approach it as you WANTING what you should be eating, and NOT WANTING what you know is unltimately making you unhappy.
And if you desperately want something to have it without guilt or recrimination, but instead a I really, and if I have it I will go for a half hour power walk tomorrow. So you can enjoy it now that you have decided you are going to eat it.
Buy yourself a pedometer and make sure you do at least 10,000 steps a day – you are good at rules so this one should be easy for you, get up in the morning and dance to your favourite tune, greet each day with a smile and that in itself will light your mood and enable you to make good decisions foodwise!!
I am 7lbs heavier than I want to be, but I WILL be getting my backside back into gear, eating healthily (once I’ve finished this box of thorntons!) and getting back on the fitness wagon!
wishing you happiness and love for 2011 and beyond
Jo x
Thank you Jo
Yes, it’s all about retraining myself to stay focussed on what I DO want, you’re so right, and developing new, improved habits. (I did laugh out loud at your Thorntons comment hahaha). Here’s to an amazing 2011 and friendships both online and offline! Sarah x